Monday, March 26, 2007

A little clue in finding ones calling

For several years I've felt a desire to do more with my life than the job I work in the high tech industry. In the high tech industry I've had the opportunity to participate in producing services and products which have had a large impact in the world, by helping define the World Wide Web as it is today. But it seems these things, these technological marvels, do not change anything about the human behaviors that, for instance, lead to warmongering, mass death, destruction of civility among people, environmental destruction, etc. In other words I'm in the same boat as are many others. My day job seems to not help the world to become a better place, but instead seems to help the world either stay the same as it's always been or perhaps become worse.

It may be hard for most to see this connection, I know it's difficult for me to truly grasp it. It's not like I work in a bomb factory and the direct result of my work is the tools which the military industrial complex uses to sow death around the world.

It just occurred to me the way I choose the work I perform is perhaps just as important as the content of what that work is.

I originally chose this work in technology based on interests in gadgetry. In high school when I found the computer lab (this was 1973 when high school computer labs were very rare) it was really cool working out how to make the machines do things. That fascination is what drove me to learn more, and to pursue the studies in college that eventually led me to Silicon Valley. The choices were from my head being fascinated with the workings of these machines, and from recognizing that working with machines allowed me to retreat from being around humans. My life up until then led me to deep distrust of other people and in my subconscious it seemed far safer to be around machines than around people. In other words I've chosen this career path based on a fear of being around people, and based on mental fascination.

There's a truism that what you pay attention to grows. By choosing a life path based on fear and mental fascination, that's about giving attention to those fears and mentality.

It seems that I'm not alone in making choices this way. What if "we" were to choose what we do in a different way? For example what if "we" were to make our choices from a desire to bring more peace and love to the world. Oh, and I am speaking about myself as much as anybody else.

"How"? The first step is to recognize the problem in the first place. The first step in curing an addiction is to recognize that you're addicted to something. Then once you recognize how this pattern works for you, is the path of breaking out of the mold of habitual thinking. One way is meditation since it is a way of learning to focus ones attention on something. Meditating on love should give you practice in having or being love.

Another method is to consciously partake in activities that offset your habitual patterns. If you habitually get serious, find ways to loosen up and have fun. Such as reading the comics every morning and learning to laugh with them, or to watch silly movies and enjoy the silliness.